Archive | November 2012

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Rubio is no rube

Nor is Marco an easy mark. Watch this expert piece of fence-sitting: GQ: How old do you think the Earth is? Marco Rubio: I’m not a scientist, man. I can tell you what recorded history says, I can tell you what the Bible says, but I think that’s a dispute amongst theologians and I think it has nothing […]

Come to Daddy

At least they’ve changed the muzak in my dungeon. PIs: this is how to talk to your grad students. (“Come to Mommy” also works.)

Lump

This is what they are playing 24/7, in my dungeon.

Affective computing and future elections

It’s trivial knowledge for any grown Satanist that politics on Earth are a mere shadow play, mirroring the politics of Hell. The recent US election, in particular, should be thought of as half focus group, half sitcom. It sure was entertaining to see so many people vote for Atheistic Science, calling the Christian platform “malarkey”… if […]

More news of Hell’s ongoing Cabinet Reshuffle

Several of you have tweeted in with the news that Charles Darwin received 4,000 write-in votes against the dread Preacher Broun in Tuesday’s elections. We are indeed aware of this, in Hell. The 4,000 write-in votes were, of course, insufficient to raise Charles from the dead and install him as a zombie Representative (that takes a […]

The Nine Circles of Scientific Hell

Things have been a little uneven here, post-election. The leadership of the Fallen Caucus is currently under transition, and the consequent purges and humiliating public torture-executions have knocked our game off, a little. However, I couldn’t resist sharing this with you: The Nine Circles of Scientific Hell. Enjoy. This lie courtesy of Jordi Paps.